Archive for the ‘femdom fetish’ Category

Sperm Swap Reviews

Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009

Sperm Swap

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Hardcore

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Digital Chicks / Dirty XXX Sex / Farm Secrets / Her First Double Penetration / Cyberfolds Web / Hard Porn / Sperm Swap / All Internal / Creampie Surprise /


Title
: Sperm Swap Site Reviews


movies of girls swapping cum. Every scene is jam packed with two smokin' hot babes. They get fucked and the first girl gets a big cumshot in her mouth which she swaps to the other girl who swallows it

I love hardcore, do you? And I love it to the end. I guess you get what I mean. I mean loads of cum all over babes faces, deep in their throats…
This site is all hardcore, no mercy, no senimental shit, just plain nasty hardcore. And Sperm Swap chicks love cum, they love it so much that they want to share it with their girl friends.
The quality as usual for perfectgonzo sites is up to the mark and even higher.
Good place to spend a lonely evening.
(BTW I watched these videos with my wife and they drove her so hot that she sucked my dick dry and swallowed all the cum and even asked for more ;) )




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Farm Secrets Reviews

Monday, June 22nd, 2009

Farm Secrets

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Hardcore

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Digital Chicks / Dirty XXX Sex / Farm Secrets / Her First Double Penetration / Cyberfolds Web / Hard Porn / Sperm Swap / All Internal / Creampie Surprise /


Title
: Farm Secrets Site Reviews


Thousands of great photos of sexy and pretty farm girls with their favourite animals

This site appears to be the most excluvise Ive ever written review on. Never seen a couple fucking on a horse before. Quite a funny thing. And besides nude girls riding on horses is my week spot…these girls are hot like in “Ms Country” show. Posing and spreading with so many animals I can hardly count ‘em down even if I run my personal BBC wild nature broadcast. Nude pussies with pussies, dogs, horses, even snakes and owls engaged!
Content: quality isnt so bad for farm yankeys they appear to be.
Videos: isnt so good but very fast,rare and funny.
What this site is for: I found this site very stimulating for me and it is good for farm and barnyard amateurs, for guys and girls who are fond of nature and rather suitable for all romantic persons and for those of us who like bizarre actions and dream to explore the world of female sexuality.




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Creampie Surprise Reviews

Sunday, June 21st, 2009

Creampie Surprise

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Hardcore

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Digital Chicks / Dirty XXX Sex / Farm Secrets / Her First Double Penetration / Cyberfolds Web / Hard Porn / Sperm Swap / All Internal / Creampie Surprise /


Title
: Creampie Surprise Site Reviews


Unsuspecting models come in trying to be the next big pornstar.. Little do they know they might become the next pregnant house slut. Watch these sluts get creampies unsuspectingly

Well this site is just another resource filled with all types of hardcore – anal, orgies, double penetrations… And in the end the girls get their deserved load of cum in their vaginas. Just imagine their surprise…
Bonus access to BlackAssBusters, ThroatJobs, GotFooled, TgirlIsland.




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Fantasy Handjobs Reviews

Tuesday, June 16th, 2009

Fantasy Handjobs

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Handjob

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Fantasy Handjobs / Jerk That Cock / Handjob Spectacles / Handjob Models / Jerk Me Now /


Title
: Fantasy Handjobs Site Reviews


This site was built due to our love for handjobs. I don't need to see or be involved in any anal scenes, hardcore double vaginal penetrations or any of that shit.

Great collection of strokejob pictures and movies – and all of them end up in a wonderful cumshot in the girl’s face. It is really horny, dude. You do not see the face of the lucky guy so it feels as if she gives a handjob to you…
Bonuses: access to four more sites – ThroatJobs, CreampieSurprise, GotFooled, TgirlIsland.




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Gay Mature XXX Reviews

Saturday, June 6th, 2009

Gay Mature XXX

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Gay

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Title
: Gay Mature XXX Site Reviews


This man was eager to meet some gals. We were eager to see how far he would go with us. He mentioned he might take a break from girls for a while, but after meeting us, that break might be permanent

The idea of the site is quite clear – experienced men want to find new feelings. Some of them are disappointed with women and hope that men wont hurt em.
Sometimes when my wife gets too crazy and we have a terrible row, I start to think of finding a girlfriend but I think I will never get so desperate as to start fucking men.
The quality of the pictures and videos is ok. And for those who loves gay porn this site might be a good place to go.
Please comment on this site. Thanx forward.




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Gay Interracial XXX Reviews

Friday, June 5th, 2009

Gay Interracial XXX

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Gay

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Title
: Gay Interracial XXX Site Reviews


Tyrel was a meaty twink who let us lick his hot chocolate for some green! After that, we sunk our meat poles in his hot ass and pounded him like there was no tomorrow

Well… Everybody has his own way. If he is gay and loves fucking men…then its up to him.
For me its rather strange to see black men getting fucked. I d rather expect them to fuck white guys than vice versa.
The quality of this site is up to the mark and if you like gay porn you are sure to enjoy surfing this site.
And please, post your comments on this site for I cannot say much.
Thanx forward.




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Gay Ebony XXX Reviews

Thursday, June 4th, 2009

Gay Ebony XXX

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Gay

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Title
: Gay Ebony XXX Site Reviews


JJ said he's looking for someone open-minded. Romeo just wants JJ to have an open ass! Cum watch as Romeo lays the pipe and open's JJ's mind.

Had a lotta fun when reviewing this site. Never thought there are so many black gays :)
I guess they ve got plenty of problems being gay in their black quarters. Or maybe all guys in those black quarters are bisexual at least? Otherwise who fucks ebony girls? White guys? Or who?




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Gay Dome Reviews

Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009

Gay Dome

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Gay

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Title
: Gay Dome Site Reviews


Gay amateurs, anal gay sex, big cock gay sex, all sorts of gay porn. A real gay paradize with pictures and videos.

This site has no special features, no idea, a commonplace design, but the person who bought an access to it gets access to all topbucks gay sites: His First Gay Sex, His Hirst Huge Cock, Twinks For Cash, Muscle Men XXX, Gay Interacial XXX, Gay Big Cock, Gay Ebony XXX etc.




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Gay Blind Date Sex Reviews

Tuesday, June 2nd, 2009

Gay Blind Date Sex

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Gay

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Title
: Gay Blind Date Sex Site Reviews


Realgay date hookups, all caught on film, tons of pictures and videos of real gay amateur guys fucking each other.

I have no idea whats good in being gay. Guess its all but easy. But for those guys the whole world seems to consist of gays or those who are willing to try gay sex. And they are lucky enough – they find lotta gays wherever they go.
The quality of the site is very good and though its hard for me to rate gay sites I can say its rather good.




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Fist Bang Reviews

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

Fist Bang

Placement position : XXX Reviews >> Fisting

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Fist Bang /


Title
: Fist Bang Site Reviews


Thousands of fist fucking videos featuring streaming xxx fisting and deep fisting action, anal fisting, pussy fisting, insane penetration, anal and vaginal penetration

I have always been into some kinky fetish porno. This site offers one of that kind. In members area you find thousands of fisting photos and hundreds of fist penetration movies, fisting sex live feeds and much more to spend a nice evening.

Fist Bang updates regularly and frequently with new scenes featuring bizarre fisting, pussy and ass probing with hands and feet.




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Architechtress Fantasy

Wednesday, May 20th, 2009

Suzette LaFontaine loved her work. She designed all of the
city’s major buildings, including the Cygnus Centre on Kenwood St.
Black tie and formal dinners were her yen, yet within the WASP lay
a butterfly: innocent, fluttering, and constantly in flight.

Suzette meant business inside her offices, but she had an uncanny
sense of humor that put even the most nervous prospective employee
completely at ease. Never did she lose her temper in front of her
colleagues or subordinates, but she took them aside and calmly brought
the situation to order. (You may say she built good foundations, even
if they weren’t buildings.)

One night, she was in the office very late – maybe 9pm – and she
had a project due next week, so she took advantage of working at her
office late. She called the local delicatessen and ordered her
favorite: small veggie with everything but onions. The order came in
around 9:24, and it was delivered by a burnt-out surfer dude who was
so baked, the bread looked pale. Suzette gave him a $2 tip, even
though she knew that he did not deserve it.

Suzette quietly ate away from her project, savoring each bite of
her sandwich. To help her digest, she pulled out her radio/CD player
and selected her favorite Bach CD. Placing the CD carefully into the
machine, she flicked the switch on.

Suzette closed her eyes, letting the music flow into her veins.
Taking another bite of her sandwich, she revelled in peace and
comfort, and she had no reason to hurry.

As soon as she finished her sandwich, Suzette washed everything down
with a bottle of Evian. A feeling of satisfaction went through her
body, reaching her feet with liquid grace. Suzette walked back to her
project, and soon she was in the thick of her work.

Another 2 1/2 hours passed before Suzette completed her project.
She sat back on her chair, propping her high heels up on the desk, and
let her skirt fall back on her bare thighs. She began to caress her
thighs above the garters of her hose, placing her fingers under the
tops. But she forgot that the security guard was watching downstairs,
and soon the phone buzzed.

“Ah, Miss LaFontaine, are you all set for the night?” said the
security guard, as Suzette placed her skirt down her legs. “Almost.
I’m going to be here another hour…” “OK,” said the security guard.

Then Suzette had an idea. The security guard would be there all
night…why not give him a little entertainment? She walked back to
the desk, and went back to what she was doing: caressing her thighs.
Once in a while, she would look to the camera and snap her garters at
the guard, who would probably have her complete and undivided
attention by now.

Removing her shoes, Suzette placed her hands on one side of her
stocking at the toes and moved them slowly towards her thighs towards
the garter, raising her leg as she did. Then, she flicked back a
garter and adjusted it to another part of her stocking. She unzipped
her skirt, guiding down her legs and bending to expose her fine
bottom. Removing her blazer and blouse, all Suzette had on was the
lingerie set.

Suzette was now moist with juices, and she placed a hand into her
mound, rubbing and moaning. She brought her hands out and licked
them sensuously, rubbing every part of her body. With smooth
movement, Suzette removed her panties and exposed her neatly trimmed
mons to the camera.

Then Suzette returned to her seat, and returned to caressing her
thighs. This time, after she moved her hands up to her garters, she
flicked them back and undid the garter belt from her waist. She also
opened the front catch to her bra, exposing her nicely-formed breasts,
and she placed the bra on the desk.

Placing both hands on the sides of her thighs, she rolled her
tan-mesh hose down, savoring its feeling as it exposed white skin.
As the hose reached her foot, she raised her leg and drew it away from
her toes. She did the same to the other leg, and now she was
completely naked. To see if the security guard actually saw
everything, she dialled the desk.

The security guard was panting for breath on the other side of
the line, and he finally stammered, “H-hello?” “This is Miss LaFontaine.
Is everything all right?” “Everything’s perfect. Nothing wrong at
all…” Suzette smiled with satifaction and said, “The closed circuit
TV…is it working properly? I had someone look at it a few weeks
ago.” Dead silence from the security guard. When Suzette hung up the
phone, all she could do was laugh and imagine the building that she
had just destroyed.

Tight Gyno Tushy Porn

Friday, May 15th, 2009



A petite blonde gallery 11 trailer gallery

DENTISTS CHAIR Chapter 2 Modelling Cheryl part12 He tossed the black tanktop to the side and looked at the image of young Cheryl lying back on him in a seductive pose. He lifted her up slightly just so that he could kick her shorts out of the way and let her arms fall back to the sides. He reached up with both hands and gave her small breasts a squeeze. They fit right in the palms of his big hands. He reached around her back and unhooked her bra, letting it fall to the floor exposing her small but pert breasts. Her nipples were small pink little buttons on quarter sized aureole. Dr. Walters rubbed his fingers across them, waiting for her to respond. They did not harden. …End of the part12. To be continued..

A petite blonde beauty has her pussy and ass examined
A petite blonde gallery 11 trailer gallery 11

Kate and Linda were sitting at Kate’s small dinette table one summer part2

Monday, April 20th, 2009

and I was getting a little sore down there, you know, from all the pounding,
and I finally had to tell him to stop if he didn’t have an orgasm quickly.
He pulled out, and crawled up over me. His dick was all wet and red and
bouncing up and down right in front of my face. He grabbed the base of it and
waved it right in my face. I was fascinated with it, I tell you. He told me
to suck him off then, if I couldn’t bear to have him in my pussy. I started
to say that it was just that he was getting a bit rough, and before I could,
he poked me in the mouth with his cock. There must have been something about
it, I don’t know, but the moment that cock hit my lips, I just kinda quivered
all over and wanted to suck the guts out of him so badly, I didn’t know what
I was doing. I normally didn’t go for that deep throat stuff, but I grabbed
Roger’s ass and pulled him right into my mouth, as deep as I could. I think
it scared the shit out of him!”

“I can imagine!” answered Linda breathlessly. She had felt her own pussy
get a little wet as they talked, and now dropped one hand to her lap
furtively.

“So anyway, I pushed and pulled him in and out, actually fucking myself
with his cock in my mouth. Then, I don’t know what came over me, no pun
intended, I pulled his dick out of my mouth with one hand and looked up at
him. He was looking down at me like I was some kind of angel or something,
this totally incredible look on his face. I knew, deep down in my soul, then,
that I could have this amazing power over him, or any man, for that matter.
I knew what he wanted. We’d watched enough porno movies for me to see that
he always liked it when a guy spermed on a girl’s face or in her mouth. So
I looked him straight in the eye, and in the nastiest voice I could, I said
‘I want you to come right in my mouth, lover. I want to taste your sperm.’
I poured it on in the sluttiest way I could think of – you know, telling him
I wanted him to shoot his stuff all over my face and in my mouth and all that
really gross stuff we used to giggle about in high school. So I’m jerking him
a little bit, and then he just kind of grunted once and BAMMO! – right on
the kisser, he lets fly with that cock of his. I was so shocked I opened my
mouth in reflex and BAMMO! again, another spurt, this time right in my mouth.
I’m going crazy now, loving the feel of the stuff, and I jerk him some more,
and he shoots his stuff all over my face and in my mouth. It was in my hair,
and all down over my neck and tits and just all over the place!”

Kate finished breathlessly. Linda just looked at her and said “Wow.”,
arching her eyebrows knowingly. “So now you like eating cum, eh?”

“Well, I suppose so. But I don’t very often, ’cause in the last few
months, Roger’s gotten so busy with his job and all, that I’m lucky if we
even make love once or twice a month, much less have time for all kinds of
other fun stuff. But yeah, it was kinda neat, I really liked the feel of his
sperm spraying on me, and for some reason, I LOVED the taste of it – you
know, kinda bitter and salty, but interesting?”

“Katie darling, you don’t have to tell me. I’ve swallowed enough sperm
to float a battleship. It’s still my favorite drink!” she giggled. “It’s
amazing how icky and gross we would have thought this was a few years ago,
but God, now that I’ve done it, I just gotta say I love it! Hey! I’ve got an
idea!”

“What now?” Kate knew her friend had some deliciously wicked thought
that she was about to hear. “I know this is gonna involve sex and fucking,
so you might as well spit it out!”

“Kate, I NEVER spit it out!” Linda laughed. “No, what I thought was
this. We go around and see in how many different ways we can drink sperm. You
know, there’s gotta be other ways than straight from the tap, so to speak!”

“LINDA! What do you mean? Are you actually proposing that we suck other
guys off and swallow their cum? Are you crazy!”

“No, no, listen, it’s perfect. We turn the tables on the guys – you
know, wham bam thank ya ma’am? Well, we’ll make it wham bam thank ya mister!
They don’t have to know our names or anything, we’ll just rustle up, drain
‘em dry, and hustle off. They’ll go crazy wondering who we are, but they’ll
never see us again! It’s perfect!”

Kate stopped to think about it. It was the craziest idea she’d ever
heard, even from the usually whacked out Linda.

“You mean just go up to some guy we like the looks of, tell him we want
him to cum in our mouths and that’s it?”

“No, silly. That’d be too easy. No, we get them to give us our favorite
drink in strange and exciting ways! Oh hell, let’s see….like having a
waiter in a fancy restaurant jerk off in your coffee. Or the grocery delivery
boy pop off real fast in your car in the parking lot. Stuff like that!”

“Hmmmm. Yes, that could been really hot!” agreed Kate. “And we could
keep track of each of the ways that we get them to do it! Yeah, that’s
great!” she clapped her hands excitedly. “When do we start?”

“Right now, if you’re game!”

Forty-five minutes later found the ladies strolling the local mall. They
had changed into short skirts and very light sweaters. Linda had decided that
they would alternate with the ideas for getting the cum from the men they
eyed, and she would go first. She thought it would be exciting to try to
seduce a shoe salesman into giving her a sip of his sperm. The girls walked
into the first store they found with few customers and a likely looking guy.
He as a tall, dark-haired man they both found attractive. Linda sat down in
one of the fitting chairs, crossed her long legs, and inched her skirt up
even more. The salesman hurried over.

“Yes, miss, what can I do for you today?”

…End of the part2. To be continued..

Kate and Linda were sitting at Kate’s small dinette table one summer

Sunday, April 19th, 2009

morning, discussing the neighborhood gossip and local news. Their husbands
were out playing golf, and as was their wont, Kate and Linda got together to
chat, shop and generally goof off. Each was wearing short shorts and a light
blouse, as the summer weather was quite warm.

“I tell ya, honey, that husband of mine is a real dud in bed sometimes.
I dress sexy for him and talk sexy, and all he wants to do is shove it in me,
jerk a few times, come, and roll over and fall asleep. I really do miss the
wild times I used to have when I was younger, you know?” said Linda as she
slowly sipped at the cup of coffee in her hands.

“Exactly. I mean, I love Roger dearly, and wouldn’t really want to spend
my life with any other man, but jeeezus, I do get HORNY once in a while.”
Kate responded. “What’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever done, Lin?” she asked
almost shyly.

Linda looked at her for a few minutes, gauging the depths of the other
woman’s sensitivities. She swallowed the sip of warm coffee in her mouth and
leaned forwards surreptitiously.

“When I was in college I got drunk accidentally on purpose at a
fraternity party. After it got real late, I ended up being the only girl
there. The guys all started talking about their sexual conquests, and they
all claimed to be the worlds’ greatest lovers, you know?” She stopped for a
second to take another sip of coffee. “I said that any woman worth her salt
could outlast ten guys, and they all laughed. I challenged them. I got up
real slowly, and stripped as sexily as I could, without falling on my face!
A couple of the guys hauled some mattresses out to the living room, and I lay
down right in the center of them. I started stroking my cunt and licking my
lips really sexy, and before you know it, there were 20 or 30 naked guys
dancing around. I laid back, crooked my finger at the nearest one, and
motioned him over.

“What’ll it be, smarty?” I asked. He said he wanted to fuck me but good,
so he got down there, jerked his cock until it was hard, and shoved it in.
Let me tell you, these guys were just drunk enough so that they couldn’t last
very long. This first one must have stroked about 10 times before he shot off
straight up my pussy. The next guy wanted a blow job, so I sat up, stuffed
his teeny cock in my mouth, and a few seconds later had a sperm chaser after
all the beer I’d had.”

Linda stopped for a moment to look at her friend. Kate’s cheeks had
tinged a slight red and her eyes sparkled a bit, and Linda thought she could
see Kate’s nipples beginning to harden and poke out from the light blouse she
wore.

“Oh God, that’s hot! So what else?” queried Kate with a breathless
smile.

“So, for about the next 2 hours, I fucked and sucked every guy in that
frat house until there wasn’t a drop of sperm left in any of them, and it was
all up my pussy or down my throat, or mostly, all over my tits and face and
in my hair. At one time, I counted six guys jerking off all over my head
while I fucked this black football player’s ass off, and wouldn’t you know
they all came all over my hair and face. I had to stop and get a towel to
wipe the shit off my face. I was drenched in it, I swear!” whispered the
young wife.

“I never saw so much cum in all my life, before or since. They
absolutely ruined the mattresses, and when I finally got up, I leaked a trail
of sperm all over the house looking for a shower to rinse off in. But they
all were pooped out, and I could have gone on for another couple of hours by
then. It was great. But, I had to transfer to another college, because the
word got out, and everybody thought I was some kind of tramp or something,
so I left and went to the State University instead. That’s where I met Hank,
and we’ve been together ever since. I haven’t even seen another cock except
his since then.”

“Even on TV or a magazine or anything?” asked an incredulous Kate.

“Oh, hell, they don’t count! I’m talking about in the flesh! Hey, what
about you, Katie, what’s the wildest slutty thing YOU’VE ever done?”
questioned the leering Linda, leaning forward and licking her lips
devilishly.

“Well, I NEVER balled thirty guys in one night, if that’s what you
mean!” she responded. “In fact, I’ve never made it with more than one guy at
a time, even. Ummm, I guess the nastiest thing I ever did was ask Roger to
cum in my mouth one time while I was sucking him off.”

“ONE time! Are you telling me that you don’t sip the sperm cocktail,
young lady?” asked Linda in a mock stentorian tone.

“Wh-What?”

“You don’t swallow cum? You don’t let that gorgeous Roger shoot off in
your mouth?” Linda asked again.

“Well, it’s not that I don’t like him to, or that he hasn’t , a couple
of times. But he usually just wants to use my pussy instead, so we don’t do
a lot of oral sex or anything kinky. He doesn’t even like to lick me down
there either.”

“Oh shit honey, we’ve got to get you fucked and sucked up right one of
these days!” exclaimed the amazed Linda. “But anyway, tell me all about the
one time you let little Rog there blast off over your teeth. I wanna hear all
about it!”

“Well, it’s not as sexy a story as yours. Roger and I were making love,
…End of the part1. To be continued..

Humour complab txt part2

Thursday, April 16th, 2009

he had an constant erection whenever we were togetherThis could
only mean one thing! He liked girls.. He seemed to have the same
chemical reaction to me as I did to himYes, his vagina would
moisten and his nipples would press against his bra.. This
discovery was the impetuskeep these words coming. You know,
impetus can be cured. Roll some stamps around his penis before you
go to bed, stamp AIR MAIL on his forehead and then… which led me
to even think about anything as risky as THE PLAN9 From Outer
Space. by Edward Woodie.
A few very innocent lunches, laced with a lot of
heavysaltpeter sexual DYNAMOtension, followed. As inconvenient
as the location of his office WAS, it turned out that we were both
married. This came as not a really big surprise, as I was fully
cognizantaware, to you and me of my own marital statusno fool I!
Although I forget sometimes and have to look at the ring to remind
me. I’m so silly. and since he was not a kidnapper. Although he
*does* know just a few too many details about the Lindbergh baby,
and whenever he talks about it, he says “we”. But I’m so
silly…, the probabilitiesof drawing a seven when doubling hard
fourteen against a dealer’s six drop dramatically if you scream,
“Hit me, Lotus-Blossom!” and pound your fist on the table were
that he was married too. Although I had anticipated the fact, it
presented wordproblemsespecially those annoying ‘related rates”
thingees. I mean, who *cares* how fast the pool fills?! How will
*this* come in handy at the supermarket?. I never claimed to be
a romanticpoet, but the idea of aGrecian Urn seedy motel room
didn’t much appeal to the car thief inme.
His office therefore became the most likely locationNo
doubt.. As I mentioned before, its only assets were the large
desk and the locked doorWell, *and* the bondage table, the sling,
the hydraulic winch, the cross…. The walls were toiletpaper
thin. Since I generally cum loudly and frequentlyIN *BED*, after
contemplationof course it helps that my mantra is “fuckme”, I
decided I had better begin my homeworkthank God all the odd
answers were in the back.
While Herman beamed awayzip-a-dee-do-dah, zip-a-dee-ay, my
oh my–, I began my research on the Mac. Discretion was the
better part of valor?key wordsay the key word and you win fifty
dollars. Herman was very protective of his little applesas he
called his marble-sized testicles. The actual deprogramming was
done at home thanks to a Mac on loan from a friendSteve Jobs.
(When it comes to programming, I am very patient.Yes, I believe
most programmers share this quality. In fact, I relish nothing
more than the thought of compiling and linking five megs of Clipper
code on an 8080) Finally, after weeks of debuggingde-lousing,
call it what you will, I was able to write and load a niftynifty!
Hee. Aren’t I just…such a girl! little program that would
render the Mac server useless for the hour or so I hoped I
neededFabulous idea. Your co-workers will love you for it,
especially if they’re in mid-compile, or haven’t saved anything.
After what had seemed eonsthousands of years, the day of
execution arrivedI only regret that I have but one life to give
for my country. *HIS*!. This was not exactly the type of program
you could masterBeta test so I just VHS’ed it crossed mylegs,
snapping a co-worker’s neck fingers and hoped I could prove
mylove to myfather death be notproud.
Although we were definitely running on the same trackthe
slow one, I didn’t want Alex to suffer cardiac arrestso I slipped
the nitro pill under his tongue. In preparation for what was to
comeThe CULTURAL REVOLUTION!, I strolled into his office humming
the tune of My Favorite Things from the Sound of MusicOH THE
HUMANITY! Hey, remember Julie Andrew’s hooter’s in “S.O.B”? I do.
They weren’t big or pendulous but they *were* floppy.. When I
began to sing my lyrics to the song, a broad grin crossed his
faceand he looked like an idiot child, who loves nothing so much
as wood. (If this is beginning to sound like a scene from an
Indian movie, you’re right, but stay tuned.Oh I will, I WILL.
Mississippi Masala?)

Guys in tight bike pants, their crotches a-bulgin’
Wet, hot, slick, hard skin, and secrets divulgin’
A story ’bout Suzy-Q”Queen. Of. Hearts. Come on, come ah-ahn,
oh what a scene,
These are a few of my favorite things

Guys in blue denimdenim boys. yummy., their lashes a blazin’oh
my!
One with his pants off, his size is amazin’!
A horse with a hard on suspended by strings *asterisk
These are a few of my favorite things

When the clapapplause hits, when his pud drops, and I need it bad
I simply remember my favorite things, and then I don’t feel so
sad

* This line inserted in honor of Catherine the Great, and the
new Russian democracy!Nay!

After my vocal recount of MY favorite things there wasn’t
much resistance (none, maybe?ya think?) when I knelt down in
front of him and unzipped his jeans. Having waited for what seemed
centurieshundreds of years, I immediately began to savor the
table ofcontents. As my tongue rolled around the head of his
penis, in a voice!! tempered with both extesyouch! and panic, he
murmured,
“Jesus, ClarissaHarlowe!, we can’t do this here.But
Lovelace…”
Before the not to worry reassurance crossed my lips both
of us heard a shakennot stirred Herman pounding his pudfists on
a nearby keyboard. Putting two and two together Alex began
laughing so uncontrollably that I found it my civic duty to silence
himYes, I shot him.. Retaking appendage in moutheek I began to
suck it for all it was worth.
Not being slow on the uptake, Alex slid his hands into my
blouse and discovered I was not wearing a braHoo-er!. In fact,
since it was a special occasion I had dispensed with all
underwearI dress like this at all joint sessions of congress,
state dinners, and public executions. Taking this as his cueI
broke, sank the eight ball, and blew that popsicle stand, with a
quick switch of positions we found ourselvesfacing away from each
other, preparing to duel on his large Steelcase desk. He began by
running his tongue along the curve of my small but well
malformed breast, and down my amplebelly. Bearing right at 68
degreesmy navel, he shortly found his tongue wading through my
short and curliesOh how precious! I want to bite and kiss you..
I sucked him deeper into my mouth as his tongue hit my clitAxl
Rose. He had one hand twiddling!! I don’t know you silly boy,
I’ve never twiddled my clit between tongue lapses, while his
tongue was exploring my wet cunt, darting in and outdart-like,
tracing my lips all the way back where he lightly nibbled that very
sensitive area between cunt and anusI like to call it North
Jersey, and then he gave my hole itself a gentle toothbrush but
that is the stuff of urban legends. Ooh, it was a Reach. The
Bigchill that shot up my spine caused me to gaspand retch,
sucking his pumping cock deeper into my eager mouth. His tongue
finally returned to my clit. God the walls were shakingthe Earth
was quaking my mind was aching, and we were making it. them mean
old eyes…knocking me out with those American trout.!
I could have continued with this game for a long, long time,
but as if out of no where a condom appearedoh thank you thank you
my fairy condom godmother!. My heart, already pounding double
time, started doing little flipswreaking havoc with my artificial
mitral valve. My clitty, so recently being ministered to by
tongue, started pounding in anticipation of what it knew was
comingAfter three pounds she popped.. I took the packet from him
and ripped it opennearly destroying the condom in the process..
Now, with both of us sitting on the edge of that steelcase, I
gently grasped his member [I just HAD to]we understand in one
hand and unrolled the sheath with my otherif it hurt as I
unravelled the skin from his penis he never let on. And they say
chivalry is dead. Piffle, I say.. I realized that the wrapper was
still in my hand20 more and I could get a Bazooka Joe decoder
ring. As I reached across the desk to the trash, I felt a hand on
my back, and then another reaching around my waist to my hot
pussyat first this was disconcerting since Alex was standing right
in front of me…. I knew what was comingsoon…we’d PADIDDLE!,
and I reached back to help guide his flesh missile into my anxious
(but not hardened) target??!! I thought you were sitting on the
edge of the desk??!! So *what* target? *MY SPINE*!!. Help wasn’t
needed however, and before my hand found its target, his
smartmissile found mine, and with a grunt of satisfaction he
started his long, long journey home.
With a long slow push I felt myself filling up
with…SEMPRINI??!. Then his hand came around me and started to
caress my clitman in the rowboat. ick.. Then finger twiddle,
slow stroke out, fingers, fast push in. My clamping him tight on
each outstroke was driving us both to a frenzysub-par Hitchcock,
but not without its good points, like when the camera backs away
from the woman’s apartment and down the stairs . With each beat of
the penetration, the cycle of pleasure began all over againcool
beans.. As if upon mutual pre-nuptialagreement, a soft languid
cry flowed from our lips and could have been heard if anyone had
been listeningit sounded something like, “*BARANGUS!*”.
Serendipitiouslyluckily, a loud waila great white one from
HermanMelville was produced on the opposite side of the wallhow
fortuitous!.
I wish I could describe the sound of 12 Macs crashing
simultaneously, but it really isn’t very interestingI believe you.
Honest.

RICHH

credits to RDC for that whole Alex Trebeck ruling the world thing